


Without Exceptions

by kitzelo



Series: Business as usual [1]
Category: B.A.P
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Friendship, Heartbreak, Is It Angst?, M/M, No Dialogue, One-sided jonglo, because we love skydive, its sad at some points, jonglo - Freeform, jongups look is based off of skydive, oblivious zelo, yongguk is in here guess where
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-17 12:18:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18965092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitzelo/pseuds/kitzelo
Summary: Jongup remembers a lot about him and Junhong. Maybe thats why it hurts more.





	Without Exceptions

Jongup can’t think of a time that he wasn’t Junhong’s best friend. Except maybe that one time in 4th grade when he broke Junhong’s skateboard and his buddy didn’t talk to him for a week. But that was the only time. Where there is Junhong, there is Jongup, like a flower following the light of the sun from dawn till dusk. Junhong is warm like the sun, at least that’s what Jongup thinks.

 

He can remember the first time they met, it's vivid in his mind, it always will be. He can remember the way Junhong bounded into the kindergarten classroom, his fluffy brown hair and his dinosaur backpack bouncing along with him at each step. He remembers how Junhong plopped down into the seat next to him, a big grin on his face because Jongup had a pokemon backpack and Junhong loved pokemon. By the end of the 3 hour AM class the two had bonded over Bulbasaur and Eevee and Jongup practically begged his parents to let Junhong come over sometime so they could play with Jongup’s extensive pokemon plush collection. It only took a week for the parents of both children to yield, and from that point forward it became a weekend tradition for Junhong and Jongup to spend hours at each other side playing. Jongup likes to dream about those days.

 

It’s not an exaggeration to say that Jongup looks at his childhood in terms of moments with Junhong. When Jongup turned 8, Junhong was there and gave Jongup a Pikachu friendship bracelet made by himself (which Jongup still has no shame in wearing, much to Junhongs dismay). When Jongup danced for the school's 3rd grade talent show, Junhong was there in the crowd, and the first to tackle Jongup into a hug when his friend got 2nd place. When Jongup’s parents were divorcing, he would go over to Junhongs whenever the yelling would start, and Junhong would be his shoulder to cry on. The two were, in jongup’s opinion, the best example of childhood friends. He always joked that someone could write an anime about them.

 

Things started to change around the time Jongup and Junhong entered high school. Jongup doesn’t recall the exact moment, really it was something that happened over the course of a year or so. Junhong shot up quickly, almost overnight, gaining at least half a foot of height in no time. His face lost its baby shape and grew more defined, and his voice lost a long time pitch that it’d had. Jongup on the other hand, grew around an inch or two in one year, and found often himself envious of Junhong’s height, among other things. Jongup’s envy was soon overcome by other confusing emotions, more specifically, attraction. Jongup’s best friend, out of nowhere, had become hot. Jongup wasn’t unaware that he liked more than just women, but the idea had never crossed his mind that Junhong could be anything other than his baby faced best friend. By their last year in high school, Jongup was admittedly in love with his friend, and Junhong was oblivious, which was okay with Jongup. He still finds it simpler when people don’t know what he’s feeling.

 

In their last 6 months of high school, Jongup finally had his own transformation, albeit, his was not as natural as Junhongs. He dyed his hair blue, threw out his bright clothes for a more monochrome color scheme, and began a healthy workout and dance schedule, packing on some definition to his muscles. He started wearing shoes with 2 inch heels and inserts for added height, and most importantly, he once again looked the part of the older one in his friendship. Jongup wouldn’t admit it, and still won’t to this day, but a portion of him hoped that he’d catch the attention of the very person who happened to look at him the most, that his new mature look would spark some interest from Junhong in the same way that Junhong’s maturity had sparked Jongup’s. Instead, Junhong remained pal, not his partner. Jongup wonders sometimes what would’ve happened had he dyed his hair a different color, maybe that would’ve been the key.

 

Jongup remembers the Saturday after him and Junhong had graduated more than the actual graduation itself. He remembers when Junhong called him, practically sobbing, and he’ll never forget the terror and concern he felt bubbling up for a few moments until Junhong spoke. Junhong had done it, he’d been accepted into the college he worked so hard for. Junhong was over the moon, and because of that alone, Jongup was as well. That didn’t stop the tinge of hurt deep down, an hour later after he’d finished his call with Junhong. It was unrealistic that Jongup would make it into college, let alone the one that Junhong had. He wasn’t jealous, he could live without college, but he’d have to live without his best friend too. He remembers how fast the two weeks before Junhong left went. Remembers helping him pack. Remembers biting back a plea for Junhong to stay, or to take him with, or to do anything but leave him. He won’t ever forget watching Junhong’s car drive off. He always thinks about how life could’ve been if he’d spoken up instead of standing by.

 

Junhong had reassured Jongup that they’d see each other whenever Junhong was on break, but after Jongup realized how many months it would be before the first break even came along, he couldn’t accept that as the only option for their friendship. Couldn’t accept that he may have lost the chance to offer a different relationship than the one they had. After about a month of sulking, he’d shifted gears. He could still see his friend as he always has, he just had to work hard. Jongup maintains that no job would ever be as hard as the process it too to see Junhong more often.

 

Jongup applied to job after job in the city that Junhong had moved to, and received rejection after rejection. Adult life hit hard, and it became apparent that most places weren’t looking to hire some guy who only had high school under his belt. He was hearing from Junhong less and less, his best friend swamped with more school work than the younger could handle. He remembers how completely helpless he felt one evening when Junhong called him, once again sobbing, but this time for reasons of sadness, not joy. The distress in his friend's voice was enough to tell Jongup that he wasn’t the only one who missed the older times. Jongup restarted his application send outs, and yet again was met more rejection. Then it finally happened. Some run down tattoo shop was looking for someone to clean the shop up every morning and night. It wasn’t the best job, but Jongup took it, and within a week he was moving, same as Junhong had done months earlier. He still gets a smile whenever he thinks of the face Junhong made when Jongup showed up one morning, and the sense of relief that washed over Jongup to finally have things back to normal.

 

For around 8 months, everything stayed the same. Junhong would go to classes, and Jongup to work. Afterward, they’d meet up and spend the days together much like they did when they were in kindergarten. Of course, this became easier once Jongup got a car. He started driving Junhong to classes every day before he’d head in and help get the tattoo shop ready. The shop had two artists at the time, and Jongup found himself sitting and watching when he wasn’t cleaning. At some point, they began showing his the art of tattooing itself, and he made the decision that he’d like to learn how to do it, like to get a license, and then he’d give Junhong the prettiest tattoo (only if Junhong wanted of course). Junhong had expressed surprise at Jongup’s choice but never made any comments afterward. Jongup likes to think that Junhong wasn’t disappointed by his career choice.

 

Jongup and Junhong fell into an intricate dance of life, and changes slowly came to their friendship, changes that Jongup dreamed of. Jongup often found Junhong resting his head on Jongup’s lap, the two of them whispering to each other about the day. He found that Junhong would invite him to things within his social circle from college, treating Jongup as a significant part of his day to day life. But things just...can’t go right for Jongup for too long. He hopes sometimes that the universe doesn’t actually hate him, that he’s just unlucky sometimes and it’s all some sort of joke.

 

When Junhong got accepted to a local paid internship at a large accounting office, he didn’t think much of it, other than a sense of pride that Junhong was taking such big strides in his life already. He drove Junhong there on the first day, the orientation. He remembers the encouraging pep talk he gave as Junhong started to get anxious, remembers waving goodbye as his close friend, and hopefully, if all things went as planned later that evening, his soon to be boyfriend headed inside. And he remembers _him_. Tallish, taller than Jongup at least, but not Junhong tall. obviously older, and if the car he’d driven up to the place was any indication, the man was more financially stable than Jongup could ever be. He had a dazzling smile as he walked past into the building that Junhong had just entered and in that moment Jongup wanted to do nothing more than punch it off the mans face. Somewhere, deep down in Jongup, he felt sick. A sense of loss and uneasiness came over him at the sight of the man. Jongup believes that at that moment, it was a foreshadowing of the emotions he would have, later on, a warning of the heartbreak to come. He likes to think that he’s the better choice, then and now.

 

Jongup can’t think of a time that he wasn’t in love with Junhong. Except maybe the first day they’d met. But that was the only time. Where there is Junhong, there is Jongup, like a flower following the light of the sun from dusk to dawn. But sadly, the flower is forever rooted in the ground, and the sun is always destined to move its warmth to another sky.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> My sincerest apologies for any mistakes, this got finished up at 2:30am.
> 
> This is just a one shot that will tie into a longer fic. Some things will make more sense once the other one is posted, but this can be read on its own.


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